Issue 459 - I Know You'll Fail

Hi,
I hope everything is ok where you are.

So, has anyone ever said that to you - you're quite happily telling them about an ambition of yours, maybe you've even firmed it up into a goal, and you're all fired up with enthusiasm, and then the person you're talking to utters those words -
'I know you'll fail'.
Hmm....

A fellow reader (and book reader!) emailed me last week to ask what advice I give when you hear those words, as they had just had their goal thrown back in their face.
It's a good question, and it's an important key to my goal achievement formula, so here goes...

When you set your goal and decide it will happen, I advocate that you should tell as many people as possible.
This brings in all sorts of advice, and you can get great nuggets of information which will help you along the path.

One consequence of telling people about your goals is that you will *always* get some people telling you that you won't achieve it.
Some may tell you why some may tell you how, and some will have no reason, just the statement.
Don't be surprised when you hear it - on the contrary you should expect to hear it, and there's a good reason for it.

A lot of people subconsciously will want you to fail.
They won't want to see that someone has grasped the steering wheel of their own life, started to make their own decisions.
It brings home to them that they *haven't* done so, and as a result they want you to stay with them in that same boat.

Remember this may be a subconscious feeling, although it may manifest itself in very real words of discouragement.
My advice on how to react to this type of attitude is simple, and it's this...

Don't mention it to them again, and don't argue!

Yes, speak to as many people as possible about your goal, but as soon as someone starts talking negatively, don't talk to them about it again.
You will only expose yourself to their negative energy, which you don't need.

That's also one of the reasons I say don't argue your case, because you are wasting your positive energy on countering their negatives.
It is unlikely to work, and you might as well use your positive energy on peope who support you.
Then as you go further along your path to your goal, it's your actions and results which will argue your case for you.

I'm not saying you should blindly ignore negative advice.
You should assess any advice you get, but you need to differentiate between realistic advice offered in a constructive way, and plain negativity without grounds.

So, when people tell you that you won't achieve your goal, don't ignore it, but decide if it is genuine advice you can work with, or just negativity, and if it's just negativity then simply don't talk to that person about your goal again.
You'll be surprised how many of the nay-sayers will ask you how you are getting along when you stop talking to them about it!

Recognise their negativity for what it is, and it will only harm you as much as you *let* it harm you.

I've had many people in my life tell me I wouldn't achieve my goals.
Sometimes they were even right, but more often they weren't, and either way the result was not affected by their words!

Ok, that's it for this week, you can read more about this handling of negativity in my book, link below.

'Til Next Time,
Health & Happiness,
Gordon
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